Wednesday 22 February 2017

"Wait,is she getting married to a NIGERIAN?" -My Parents VS Nigerian Husband (The Truth Behind The Closed Doors)

You won't believe how many people (Nigerians and non Nigerians) have asked me "Lord Jesus Sonia,what was your parents reaction when you told them you are getting married to a Nigerian?"

Wait. "A NIGERIAN???" .
I swear,some folks sound like I went to marry an alien or something strange to a human kind. SMH

You guys know I live in a world of mine where I don't really give a sh** about race,ethnicity,tribe,religion or what so ever superficial categorization of human beings  the whole world seem to stress over, so the way some people  put importance and tension into asking this type of questions really did not make much sense to me.  Like someone's ethnicity is the most important and relevant "issue" you need to worry about when your child is getting married or what?

Since when is that more important then someone's heart and intentions? Personality? Love maybe? Compatibility between two souls? Hello? Some people sef.

I will have to disappoint you fam,there was no controversy or what so ever drama based on this particular matter when it comes to my own case.
I think ethnicity,color or nationality was not a criteria my parents  used to "judge" Ik's values and qualities as a man and a person.
There were clearly far more important features  that makes a man "good" or "bad" for your daughter.

I am endlessly grateful to my parents for "sparing" me of this type of drama a lot of mixed couples go through,but I honestly think that their attitude towards the whole situation was nothing but NORMAL,because any form of stereotype,prejudice or hatred based on color,religion,ethnicity etc doesn't just fit in my definition of  "normal" thinking.

But I can't lie,both mom and dad had experiences with stupid people here and there asking stupid questions based on this matter. So once a woman asked my mom (with a tone like she is giving her a condolence or something) how is she "managing"  and living with a ("terribly upsetting and sad") fact that I got married to an African..Meanwhile her daughter's husband is  the same ethnicity,color and religion as she is but that did not stop him from being a wife beater,cheat and alcoholic. What a moment of irony. Hmmm hmmm.  My mom just told her "if your son in law was at least as half as good as mine,you would be a happy woman and you would not have to worry about my own " .
My mom is an MVP. Lol

When Ik came to meet them they both fall in love with him . It is really difficult not to because he is really and honestly one of the nicest people I have ever came across.
My mom even got to a "brilliant" idea :  "Sonia you know what? Why don't you go back to Nigeria,leave Ik here with us,he is so polite and kind" . (Oh so I am not? Can you guys imagine? Me,Sonia,the only daughter they will ever have! Obara Jesu lol)

For better understanding of a relationship between my parents and my "Nigerian" husband I must share this picture with you:




Yes,this is a picture(very big and massive pictures)  I found hanging at the wall at my parents house when I came back to visit them this year.  Right in a living room. Yep.

Meanwhile ,did I mention that there is NO ONE SINGLE picture of me framed ANYWHERE in their home.  Ehemm.

I am still waiting for an explanation :-)
Will update you when I get one for sure .

Love you plenty!
Xo








26 comments:

  1. lollz u r so funny ma

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  2. Love must come first! I love the way you think Sonia. Very nice write up

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  3. I wish there were more people of your kind in this world to refresh this planet earth.

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  4. hahahaha sonia you put a smile on my face this morning haha this is so lovely

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  5. I feel better every time after I read your posts. This writeup is funny but the message behind it is very powerful. thanks once again

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  6. Have anyone had a similar issue with their parents? My own want me to marry a man from my village,no diff tribe or what so ever. and its killing me ,i also dont think that their beliefs are normal. of course i love them they are ma parents but its 21st century we cant allow such primitive thinkings to sabotage our happiness rite? pls correct me if i am wrong

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    1. you are very right my dear God is with u

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    2. I agree with you .Like Sonia say they might have the good intention but that doesnt mean they alway know d best. God is ur strength .

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  7. so many ppl are afraid to follow their heart bcs of all these differences u were talking about . religion,race,tribe etc is what divides ppl a lot and its really sad bcs we are all human beings made of blood n flesh. god will help us. nice1

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  9. My family disowned me because I am Igbo and my husband is a hausa man. But he treats me better then any boy from my side that I ever dated in my life. Isn't that ironic? And all my family could care about was his religion and tribe. But Sonia I am happy with him. So happy. He is my soulmate. How can anyone tell me I made a wrong choice? How?

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    1. So many people are in your shoes dear. I feel u .

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  10. Lmao darling u are hilarious

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  11. You're a very lucky woman. My parents would die if i even dream of marrying a foreigner.
    www.memoirsofagreatlady.com

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    1. Are foreigners not human beings too? Are they not made of blood and flesh?

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    2. It's a sad world we live in my dear

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  12. It's funny how so many people clame they are "God fearing " then they can deny a fellow man or a woman because he or she has a different skin color,tribe or nationality. Ppl should learn how to practice what they preach. Fake world

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    1. Jenny From Da Block23 February 2017 at 23:34

      �������������������� so on point

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  13. You have spoken to many. Love you for this dear.

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  14. u made me smile and laugh soso. Bless ur heart

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  15. You couldn't have said it better. It's funny that we are in 21st century and have changed in many ways but our thinking has somehow refused to change too. I love this.

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  16. Uhhm Sha Igbo people also have issues with their children marrying outside their hometown and even villa and I came from that type of family too. It prolly wasn't easy for Ik on his side too but love always wins and I specifically told my mum it's better she prays for a good son in law instead being interested on me getting married from our place and I'm prolly sure she understands now with all her life experiences. Let God always lead and we'd never make mistakes. Keep it up Sonia..
    www.moxiediary.com

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