Friday 25 September 2015

BabyMama Drama : is blackmailing,threatening and manipulating ok?

The gospel truth is that we (women) sacrifice a lot (naturally way more than men) for sake of having a child,and we definitely must go through a serious mental,emotional and physical shock often followed by depression and wilding hormones,so even if you have a man by your side that loves and adores you it's still not easy.( you can read  about my own experience in previous posts).
Honestly,I can't even imagine how single mothers are coping!Women are officially the strongest creatures in the world! Y'all are my heroes!
But...
What of a baby daddy? He might have done you wrong,lied,played,cheated or simply didn't take you serious enough to share his life with you. He is the reason you have been through hell and your pain and frustration slowly turns into hate and bitterness. You wanna make him pay and punish him for making you suffer,but very often forgetting one thing:
That man might not be the ideal partner,he might not be the One God planned for u,but he is still the only father of your child. And he might be a good and perfect dad to your baby and give him/her all he/she needs from a father while growing up. Please,keep in mind that him being a dad and being a partner are two different social roles he got,so don't  bring your disappointment,anger,frustration in between him and his(your) child,not for his sake (I know you might feel like he doesn't deserve to come close to the baby) but for the sake of your child because every single child needs influence of both parents (when possible). It's extremely important,for every child,to have a healthy,loving relationship with both parents,not to grow believing that he/she was abounded or not wanted or loved enough or that one parent is evil,wicked etc. Such a feeling towards a parent is simply not natural and it will affect the child's social development and might be a reason of numerous personal issues ,insecurities and serious anxieties he/she might face later on.  
So,as long as the guy is man enough to accept his responsibilities as a father ,you have no right to stop him from doing so. Don't ever use your child as a weapon of manipulation and blackmail,even if you do it "in the name of love" by trying to make him stay in your life. Love can't be forced!
 Don't ever let your child hear you speak bad about his/her father. It hurts so bad and it will make your baby suffer from inside.
Stop threatening,cut the drama - I bet you strongly believe your baby father needs to be punished but I need you to understand that the only person that will seriously and permanently be affected (mentally,emotionally,socially) is your kid!
Find a space in your heart to forgive him (and yourself). You need a peace in your heart if you want to prosper.Everything happens for a reason,and at the end of the day,if not for that man you won't have that beautiful little human being by your side. You need to be adults enough to give your child the best possible from the both sides and that should be your focus !
And as for your love life,don't worry ,it's never too late. Your life is not over,nether is it wasted. There is a man meant for you only. That one who will love,appreciate and accept you and everything that comes with you.
The best is yet to come . Remember hate alone is enough to separate you from your creator.
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6 comments:

  1. Beautiful write up .. God bless you 😘

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice one dear... Kip it up I love you.

    #Peppyisbehindu

    www.peppywhitejames.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nice one dear... Kip it up I love you.

    #Peppyisbehindu

    www.peppywhitejames.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well written, God bless you

    ReplyDelete